Sunday, 21 September 2014

: first no longer last, last will be forever

let me take a deep breath
took me so long to build up this entry
but i have to
because i want to
to let it go (insert frozen song here)haha

first no longer last
seems like you know it must be about love

just to share something
i really fall for once
few years ago

but both of us know that it cant hold till the end
because of the vibes
the vibes are not good since starting

but we still friend
still continue to be together
without no one know why
both of us also dont know why
we dont have the answer

everything we do because of the vibes

till the moment you realise that
you have no right for asking me to stay
to be like before
you have no right and you know you should not say it 

so we put the end on everything

you know that im happy
and i know that you happy

give me thousands people but still it will not be the same as the first
because we both know why

the dreams
the memories
it last 
dreams will be dreams
memories will be memories

i'll keep everything away
because i'd started my journey
and you should take yours

and to you my last love
i never imagine that i will have you in my life
seriously i dont know where you come from
but you just stand there right in front of me
and you seduce me well 

i ask Allah to help me
to make my life easier
to make my life be meaningful
i have everything, Alhamdulilah
and since everyone is asking me about jodoh
i quietly pray and do'a to You, Allah
if you have found my imam, show it to me
if you have not found him, then i'll wait
no matter how long it takes, i'll wait

and seems i dont have to wait for a long time
You give me him, my future rescue, my great partner, my soulmate, InsyaAllah

I dont have to wait for a long time to say yes to him, because i know
there is a bell rang in my heart saying that its him
he is the one
my do'a, my prayer and my instinct shows him
i just follow my heart

since the day we met, since you text me
since you asked me out (many times)
until i finally said, 'okay jom keluar tapi minum je'

you sound 'lega' 

before that i ask ayah 
how, what should i do, should i go out with him
ayah said, follow your heart my dear, you know the best since Allah had planned everything well

the next day, you proposed me instantly
it was not like an actual proposed but
when you said, 'jom balik penang, nak jumpa family iili lepas tu jumpa family din pulak'
i was like 'hmmm maksudnya apa?'
'iili sudi teman din sampai bila-bila?'
'sudi jadi isteri din?'
'sudi kita halalkan semua?'
and you know what?
i burn into tears

he say it out loud.
he said everything just after one date
after two month having text messages to each other
after two month i avoid him well 
after two month i put soo many excuse
then we went out together
the next day you proposed me

i ask him
are you sure?
we just met
we just met
we just met..keep repeating the same question again and again
and he just comfort me in every way of answering my questions
i fall again
i sigh
is it true?
i ask my heart
is it true?
am i the really one?
did he just choose me?
he choose me to be his partner till jannah
everything is just like in the novel
i love novel
keep imagine fantasy stuff

finally i give up
am i?
YES, i said yes..

i tell ayah that i found my man
he was like 'my little girl grown up so well'

may Allah ease our journey
may everything will be okay
hope the best to come
and may everything be last forever
until the end of time

i dont love you till the day me met
i just begin to know you since the moment you proposed
i just begin to care and love you since the moment you proposed
i just realised my heart begin to sing since the moment you proposed
the love keep growing till this moment
although it is not so much love 
haha..okay more than enough la kot
but i promised to love you till the end of time

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